"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
I IMAGINED YOU YELLING SURPRISE WITH JAZZ HANDS. AND I LOVE YOU FOREVER
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
I melted cheese on my pizza rolls. When I die make sure someone melts cheese on my rolls.
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
Randomize
