You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
What's the sex policy on a school bus? Because I dibs back seat.
Sex allowed. Dress code is neon and obnoxious.
We are gonna die. I wanna enforce the "no jumping out of moving vehicles" policy. And how are we gonna get a school bus through mcdonalds drive thru?
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
HEY JUST FOUND A SHIT TON OF MONEY IN THE PURSE HE SENT BRB GONNA GO BUY ME SOME MALE STRIPPERS AND BATHE IN THESE TWENTY DOLLAR BILLS
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
so it turns out that when you ride the subway drunk at 5 am you wake up with a sailor in your bed
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
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