You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
I wish you were here to vomit in your hand.
i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
two words...techno handjob
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
I'm not a horrible person, I just see what everyone chooses to politely ignore.. And occasionally say it aloud whilst deeply intoxicated.
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
So, I'm roughly 90% sure that the guy next to me in the xray waiting room is watching porn on his phone right now
Randomize
