Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
Shit is getting real. I just adjusted my search radius for my dating profile to ANY FUCKING WHERE
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Randomize
