maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
The guy who's car I hit last night just followed me on Twitter...not sure how to feel about it.
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
These muscle relaxers obviously don't work because I'm harder than a fucking diamond.
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
You did what with his pubic hair?
My EX’s roommate heard about the breakup and offered to help me bang it out. I think she hates her even more than I do.
Randomize
