Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
i just thanked the atm machine for giving me cash
so just incase you wake up on the couch wondering how you got there--you came home at 7am, put ice in a cup--then you proceeded to put the cup in the microwave and melt it because you "wanted water". you then, fell down the stairs while saying "you don't know me" then crawled to the couch.
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
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