Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
you were carrying around a glass of vodka telling everyone it was Russian water
My life is a requiem composed in the key of fuck.
8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
My greatest achievement in life thus far is being the go to friend when you have questions about butt plugs.
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
last night I used snow as a chaser
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
Randomize
