So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
From the trajectory of the puke, I must have fallen off the top bunk while trying to vomit, due to the dented bucket, ruined carpet, and bruised dignity I now own.
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
If I come in tomorrow with a cane and a seeing eye dog it's because I just mixed up my salicylic acid acne stuff with my eye makeup remover
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
I was masterbating to some porn on my phone and my mom decides to text me "are you okay?" I mean i was doing great until you cock blocked me mom..
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
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