do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
I think I breastfed the cat at some point during the night, at least that's what my nipples are saying
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
i definitely just woke up with half of a cigarette tucked underneath my balls. Last night must have been interesting
how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
i take my contacts out every time we fuck so i cant see all the stretch marks
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
my dad is now demonstrating how to start a fire with a tampon. happy fucking new year!
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
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