As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
But see that's the thing. I know i'm better looking than you, I just want you to be continually in a state of shock and awe that you could ever get a girlfriend this hot. You know?
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
where are my pants?
in the oven.
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
The ass gains better be worth it
Randomize
