Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
party gras won. party gras always wins.
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
He taped a champagne bottle to both his hands and called himself edward champagne hands. At one point he poured some on his lap and said " Just needed to make sure my dick got some too"
It's like my life is one of those movies where after a bunch of outlandish events that only happen in a movie the girl realizes her true life calling and lives a great life with a sexy man of multiple races. But I'm stuck in the fucked up part where 25 year olds come in their pants.
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
Randomize
