shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
The guy in the library beside me just whipped out an entire loaf of bread, a knife and a container of peanut butter and is proceeding to make multiple sandwiches.
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
According to facebook, I opened up a can of whupass on some douche who poured all the vodka on the ground.
You called the wrong number but I salute you.
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
I'm in the recliner and i have a bottle of wine wedged in my cleavage, drinking from a straw. Clever and classy or pathetic and sloppy?
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
Randomize
