We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
Pretty sure I just heard the turkey yell "don't put me in there" as it was going in the oven. way too high for this holiday.
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
"Fuck all you guys I'm going to be Cameltoe Spider-Man for Halloween."
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
I mostly blame me being such a miserable fuck on the fact that I was born on a Monday.
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
Randomize