I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
I woke up this morning and saw that I had transferred $0.75 from my savings account to my checking account.
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
Randomize
