38 yer olds are good kisserssss
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
I don't think tequila will soothe the spots where my tonsils used to be.
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
Well my sober pact lasted almost an hour. Then I did four shots. But in other news, one of those shots I took with a midget. So like I couldn't turn that shit down.
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
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