There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
I just tried to pick my 105-lb puppy up and accidentally fingered its asshole
There are some things we keep to ourselves Brian
I'm at work and it's 1:30. I need a beer. is that bad?
Welcome to every minute of my life.
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
Randomize
