there is a polo shirt epidemic at this bar. also, im pretty sure i just saw the grown-up coppertone baby
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
If I was a guy I'd keep a condom in my pocket, in my wallet, in my backpack, in my car, in my shoe, behind my fucking ear
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
