Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
i decided to cut a 3rd hole in to my snuggie so i could masturbate all the time.. all time low? or genius?
i don't want a singing card. it disturbs my hangover. give me a pack of cigs taped to a bottle of wine and fuck me without a condom. happy vday baby.
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
It started as a joke and ended with a trip to the emergency room, a broken macbook and a gigantic hole in the concrete of my driveway.
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
Hey, what did you end up doing with those ski goggles?
Anything is possible. I didn't even know I was wearing the toilet cover as a hat
Your topless pictures make me question reality
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
Randomize
