Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
He dated me before I started drinking. I feel like he deserves a consolation bj for all the effort he had to put in to get in my pants.
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
I just tinder matched with a blue angels pilot. I need to make out with him. For America.
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
I want a musical about memes.
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Randomize
