You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
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