Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
You know my ex in high school who cheated on me and dumped me right before prom? A decade later, I just saw her again...working at an Arby's. it was a good day...
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
We were right in the middle of sex and all of a sudden his kids toy story action figure starts talking "I think the word your searching for is Space Ranger." A literal Buzz kill. It was equally creepy and hilarious.
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
Randomize
