what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
Life is so much better after having sex.
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
Oh god. I asked to "play his sexaphone" which I though was a super sex way to say "let me blow you". He fucking walked home at 4:30am
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
You can't break up with me. I brought you to see Beyoncé.
I was christened with Fireball shots by some guy at the bar. I'm practically Jesus now.
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
Why were there just 3 inflatable bounce houses delivered to my house?
oh shit.
Randomize
