Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
Going to rent a magician for when I eat shrooms. How has no one thought of this?
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
Randomize
