No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
I'm lonelier than Tom Hanks in Cast Away, right meow. Ready to make this bong my Wilson.
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
Did you put candle wax on my balls last night?
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
How do I stop your cat from bathing me? I'm afraid she'll get drunk off my sweat
Randomize
