haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
It's not a walk of shame if you run
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
Ok, as his sister I didn't tell you this but he's very familiar with pregnancy symptoms. So next time he calls you fat freak him the hell out by asking if your ankles look swollen.
Randomize
