Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
Just letting everyone know that I am still alive after last night. On a related note, this is the 15th "I'm not dead!" mass text I've sent. You've got to celebrate the little things.
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
The Domino's delivery guy is in front of me at The Wendy's drive-through. Hmmm.....
Randomize
