and then I told her I was too drunk. She started to cry, and told me this always happens to her and that she thinks shes ugly. I pretended I was asleep and then she farted.
Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
Don't get into any trouble on your trip
The only foreseeable trouble would be pregnancy, but I gotta be sterile otherwise I'm beating some pretty fucking incredible odds
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize
