Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
life lesson# 3: saying thank you on a subway really means "im not a native new yorker, so please feel free to touch my ass"
hmm. interesting. explain how you came across this knowledge.
i sneezed. he said bless you. i said thank you. he groped. i again said thank you.
I just watered my plants with apple juice. Look what you made me do.
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
I will now refer to my life as before and after I used Astroglide for the first time
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
Randomize
