Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
Just got back from a Walmart run. The music went straight from Kid Rock to John Phillip Souza. If that doesn't scream 'MURICA I don't know what will. Happy 4th!
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