come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
they just named my boobs. Lefty is "Guenevere" and Righty is "I claim this boob for America"
i was gonna fuck her but then she started eatin sushi from her purse. i really need to raise my standards
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
Idk I've been drinking all day and they're having me blow shit up. Like dont let the drunk chick play with fire and explosives. Common sense 101. I will fuck something up
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
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