Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
My Hamptons summer hookup resume reads like a walk-in clinic waiting list.
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
I replied to the university automated mass text about the armed robbery at the on-campus Starbucks with a sad face. Basically sums up my night.
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
Also- should we send out holiday cards? That say, "Eat a dick, 2014"?
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
Your life is a soap opera of great sex, cats, and booze.
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
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