at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
so i woke up to her 8 year old asking for a bowl of cereal...
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
What was your penis's nickname in high school? Also, what was it's theme song?
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
I may wear a condom to jerk-off tomorrow knowing that my hand has touched surfaces in this bar.
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
If I had a mugshot, I would totally use it as my main picture on Tinder, just to keep it interesting.
He keeps bees of course he's weird
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
Gotta say, self-deprecating Lord of the Rings-themed sex jokes were not on my agenda for today.
Randomize
