Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
Randomize
