All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
I had to put my glasses on last night to watch porn. SO getting lasik with my tax returns this year.
I bought a fake diamond ring to wear, not only to bars to keep the creeps away, but so that I'll be judged less by the front desk girl at Planned Parenthood
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
I gave him my yeast infection. HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN WORK?
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
Randomize
