Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
Oh they knew you from a bachelorette party! You were the pole?
Ohhh shit yeah that was me. Fuck. I hate myself when I do that.
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
I met her parents last night. Her dad smelled like weed and kept yelling "I HAVE ALLERGIES AHHH MY EYES ARE BURNING!" During dinner It had to be good weed he didn't even know he was yelling.
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
Randomize
