i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
We have so much sex to catch up on
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
Randomize
