What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
Your mom is more observant then Randy Newman.
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
i just put all of my beerlympics medals into my academic awards box. i would say they are my greatest achievement since college.
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
I let a drunk, gay man in a dragon costume motor-boat me. With his dragon head.
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
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