the guy at the pet shop just had an eye seizure while looking at my chest
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
Pitting the remainder of the bottle against my hangover. I'm expecting an all out cage match for my soul and wellbeing.
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
He seemed genuinely disappointed when I told him I wasn't going to make out with him to Bring Me To Life by Evanescence so I feel like I've pinpointed the breaking point of this relationship
I love you. Go after that dick
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
Randomize
