google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
Dude, you punched me in the face bc I wasnt ordering your tbell fast enough. Then when you got it, you threw it out the window bc, and I quote, "OBAMACAREEEE!"
This is one of those times I wish I had a time machine so I could go back and punch myself in the face to make me realize what I need to do before it's too late
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
My lunch = taste testing salsas for A&P. They gave me a free 64oz grape juice as a thank you. So, now we have something to drink in the house. So while you are spending all the money on breakfast rolls and pizza for lunch, I'm cigaretteless and whoring myself for tablespoons of salsa and free juice.
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
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