You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
just served this dwarf dude an entire pitcher of malt liquor. watching this will totally be worth my bartender's certification.
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
There was a staple in my grits at waffle house last night. My knees are bruised as hell. And I puked pink all over my bathroom. Gooood night.
I was barred out and drunk as fuck locked out at 3am in my Indian costume. It was literally freezing outside. I laid down on the concrete and made a bonfire with dry leaves. Then proceeded to ask.the.bonfire nicely to "please dont go out". Drunk me went strait up survival mode.
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
I just woke up on my neighbors floor with my boots on, but no pants. I have 3 separate taco bell receipts in my pocket.
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
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