So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
she said she didn't want to sleep with me again because I wasnt a generous lover. I ignored her slight moustache, didnt i? i think thats pretty damn generous
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
you spent 5 minutes trying to open an empty PBR and kept saying "don't worry i'll get it i've been working out"
you're the only person I know who would bring a water bottle of screwdriver to a wedding, and toast with it during the speech
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
btw telling the cab driver, that took you to your booty call that is now returning your wallet that you left in his cab, that you want to hug him is awkward
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
I appreciate the I'll come bail you out of jail tone in the text
Dick very happy bro
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
What should've been a 10 minute beer run turned into her having a 40 minute mental breakdown in my car while in the parking lot. She then asked if she could live at my house and be my girlfriend. Her finishing act was stealing my peanut m&m's.
Well, when a girl introduces herself as "stormy" and gets your number from her boyfriends phone, I'd say that your situation is to be expected.
Checked my bank account this morning...apparently I went to 7-11 at 4am and spent $22 on taquitos. New all time low for me.
I ate all of them. New all time low for ME.
Randomize
