He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
Im dating a 38 year old who's lap I can fit in. Tell me I don't have daddy issues.
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
You offered the police officer a Snickers ice cream bar and cried when he wouldn't take it...
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
Something is wrong here. The birds are chirping and I'm not fucking you, I'm not getting head and I don't smell bacon. Why am I up this early then?
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