I heard we made out
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
I have the worst farts today, I'm walking by the cubicles of people I don't like and leaving them surprises. Brb.
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
Considering we're about to fuck, I really need your girlfriend to stop liking all my Facebook posts.
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
Randomize
