Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
Scratch that. Good bye liver, good bye clothes, good bye dignity. Hello awesome weekend
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
I think your dad took our porno
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
I got unbelievably drunk yesterday, need some time off. Apparently pulling your balls out to make your buddy's girlfriend miss beerpong shots is frowned upon.
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Randomize
