I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
I wanna tell red shirt guy I'm pregnant and use the abortion money for Coachella.
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
"Bring the kids" is the most terrifying 3 words I've ever heard in my life.
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
I looked into this "it's just lunch" matchmaker thing and it was like 5 grand. If I'm gonna spend five grand I'll throw in another three and get new tits and find my own fucking husband.
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
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