i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
I think my mom's writing a book called how to fuck with your kids when you know they're high
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔
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