your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
Alex texted me. Bootycall boy #2. its like an alarm goes off once i'm single that the line is open again
i know they say sex burns calories but i think i actually gained weight from just lying there for the whole 2 minutes
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
i need to find a birthday card for her that tells her how happy i am that i can now legally bang her
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
Nothing makes me happier than finding out someone else is pregnant and it's not you.
We decided to make playlists for each other. Do you know any songs that say "sorry I'm not as hot as your prostitute ex?"
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
Randomize
