did not feel like going to store to get condoms last night so went to her pantry and got a sandwich bag and a rubberband
did it work?
nope
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
She volunteers at a homeless shelter. You volunteered to drink 7 day expired milk for $3. No chance. Give up.
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
They were playing some sort of fast food scavenger hunt game as an ice breaker. Some chick stamped a Starbucks logo on my hand and told me to go find the girl with the matching stamp and fill her with cream.
Dave had an Arby’s stamp and some sorority girl grabbed him and screamed “I’ve have the meat!”\n
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