I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
you told him to eat candy out of your ear instead of your vagina because you had your period. never. drink. AGAIN.
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
There is a guy dressed as Captain America in the theatre. I want to make out with him even though I have no idea what he looks like. Wish me luck, I'm going in.
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
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