if you are receiving this text, you are one of the people i hate
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
This spray tan I used isn't working out. I spent an hour exfoliating and rubbing the damn stuff in with rubber gloves. I wanted the alluring, sun-kissed, sexy look. I've achieved smelling like burnt popcorn and the cats won't stop licking me. I'm a salt lick for cats.
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
I’ve jerked off three times and taken five shits already today. Being hung over in your 40’s is a fucking roller coaster.
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